Advertisements

O Canada!

 

All you Canadians out there, this is a rallying cry to assemble at once, Parliament Hill pronto!  Some of them Americans are putting us down, ignoring our obvious humour, charm and hygeine.  Yeah that’s right,  I spelled humour with a “u”.  Suck it.

This post was inspired by Rhonda (http://help-me-rhonda.com/), which should come as no surprise.  So to continue the frivolity and delve into the worst blog post of all time, I give you a butchered version of the Canadian national anthem, O Canada.

 

O Canada!

Our home above USA

True patriot love we pee into the wind.

With glowing farts made of nucleotides

The true north that didn’t invent Glee!

Both fat and wide,

O Canada, we chop down all our trees.

God keep our land, hilarious and freezing

O Canada, we stand erect for thee

O Canada, we stand erect for thee.

 

Advertisements
Dream hard, rage hard.

58 thoughts on “O Canada!

  1. O CANADA…you slay me. This is bloody brilliant and I will climb one more rung of the “Ok Canucks are funny” ladder. but ONLY is the last line is the fucking truth!!!

              1. Okay wow, low blow. We are very industrious people and did I mention that in 1812 or thereabouts that we sacked Washington and burned down the White House. Don’t make us do it again!

  2. Sure you chicken (poulet to you)…you don’t allow for enough comment space for me to respond to you sacking Washington!! Here’s what I have to say about that….YOU AND WHO’S ARMY?

    1. Um, well, we have this old rusty jeep, a decrepit helicopter and some security guards. Probably best we can do. But we got a lot of heart! Oh yeah, and we’re bringing our hockey sticks.

              1. yes, you should have, but I won’t count that against you, just in case in Canada they are called the “we supply chippendale dancers” store. 😉

              2. HEY…YO….Mr. Canada….Just listened to a very funny comic, named Dana Alexander. Just thought I’d drop in to tell you this:
                CANADIAN’S ARE FUNNIER WHEN THEY MOVE TO ENGLAND. 😆

              3. All right, that’s it, I’m calling Russell Peters to come down and take care of y’all with his acerbic wit. There is a truly funny brown Canadian.

              4. ROFL…y’all? You from southern Canada then? I can match southern wits with you any day my friend. Do NOT go there! And Russell Peters? Let me remind you of just ONE famous Canadian comedy powerhouse that chose to come HERE to get famous…can we spell Dan Akroid? Ok, more than one…John Candy? Michael J Fox? (ok, not so much the Fox) Eugene Levy? Rich Little for God’s sake? Really? Send Russell on down, we’ll end up keeping him, trust me!

              5. ROFL…y’all? You from southern Canada then? I can match southern wits with you any day my friend. Do NOT go there! And Russell Peters? Let me remind you of just ONE famous Canadian comedy powerhouse that chose to come HERE to get famous…can we spell Dan Akroid? Ok, more than one…John Candy? Michael J Fox? (ok, not so much the Fox) Eugene Levy? Rich Little for God’s sake? Really? Send Russell on down, we’ll end up keeping him, trust me!

                OMG…Leslie? How did I forget Leslie? Please…

    1. I’m glad someone actually added brilliant and funny to the other bits. Usually I just get that. Thanks Susan, this was initiated by Rhonda in some strange manner. I think she caught me in a weak moment.

      1. Rhonda nudges my creativity quite a bit too when we chat. Some odd quirk she has. Trent, you are much, much more than just sick and twisted–anyone who calls you just those two things is being quite lazy.

  3. response from the USA…lmao

    O Canada…from down under I see,
    Overflowing with gay men ordered to love by a Queen,
    Strong wide Mounters, who are ‘free to be me’
    With rising pants, we can clearly see thee,
    With absolutely fabulous guards, go forth
    I hate to burst your bubble, but Alaska’s true north,
    Ohh Canada … You Point The Way North!
    Ohh Canada … You Point The Way North!

  4. Meh. You’re just flavor of the month down here at the moment, like Australia was in the ’80’s. Well move on to Brazil or Iceland or Tajikistan sooner or later and you’ll miss all the attention – and you’ll be all like, “hey, remember me, your fun-time buddy from up north??”

    1. I dunno. We have a plan to marry your woman and breed our Canadian blood into you guys one state at a time, until you are all hosers like us. One day, you will wake up wearing toques for no reason, and have insatiable cravings for french fries dressed in cheese curds and gravy, and then we will see who is the flavour of the day. Tajikistan? Come on, we are way cooler than Tajikistanis.

    1. That I’d love to see… we Canadians are funny, eh?

      I can’t believe you’re reading all these old posts… if you find any that you really like, let me know.

      1. It’s fun and omgosh, your exchanges with Art in some of the comments were funny. I kinda caught up. I see where I liked and even commented. Your writing is a treat that my inbox loves to receive, and that I love to read.

Leave a Reply

Back To Top
%d bloggers like this: