Tag: madness

A Week in the Life of Blogging Superstar Trent Lewin

Monday              Wake up. There’s poop on the carpet. A thumb-tack on the stairs. There is no probable way that I could step on it. No way. Stare at my foot. There is a thumb-tack in my toe. There is shit on my heels.             […]

A Day in the Life of WordPress Darling Trent Fucking Lewin

            Wake up.  What country is this?             Downstairs, the doorman greets me.  “Hello Mr. Lewin, how are you?”             “Fucking.  Address me as Trent Fucking Lewin please.”             “Oh, I see.  How quaintly Canadian.”             “Do you know Hook?  Do you know Hookie?  Tell me right now you fucker!”             Doorman looks confused.  Tries […]

The Mail Carrier’s Guide to Slaying Monsters (Pt 3 of 3)

                Franklin got home at 8:30.  There was snow on the driveway, and footsteps leading to the front door.  Someone had crammed a complimentary newspaper and a bunch of flyers in his mailbox.  He left them there.                 Inside, he went to his office and sat in front […]

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